Since I've started trying to meet people online I realized quickly that it is hard to introduce myself to someone with whom I'm interested. In real life it's easy to hide behind the guise that we just happen to be in the same place at the same time so I might as well get to know someone. This could very well happen whether I'm interested or not. But online, if you reach out to someone it's because you're interested. No way in hiding it. So I've been exploring different approaches. Should I be more blunt (i.e. you're smokin hot so let's do this)? Should I try to be sappy and romantic (i.e. I've seen sunsets that take my breath away, though they nay approach your beauty?) Should I try to connect based on something in common between us (i.e. I see you like cats. I hate cats. Do you happen to like dogs?)?
With one girl from Utah I decided to take the direct approach:
Me: My name is Ryan. You seem like the type of person I would like to get to know better. Are you interested?
Her: But you're from Cali
Me: The adventure intrigues you? Ever dated a guy from CA before?
Her: Not while he lived in Cali
Me: Have you ever been in a long distance relationship before?
Her: Yes and it was really tough
What I wrote: Ha Ha yeah me too and it sucked! To be honest with you the only reason I'm even considering girls away from home is because I travel a bit for work so I'm open to meeting girls in other places. In fact I used to live in SLC for a couple of years and loved it. What part of SLC do you live?
What actually got posted:
First, don't judge me for trying to connect with women who use BarbieGirl84 as their username - she is pretty attractive and had a witty profile so I figured I could look past the fact that she's probably an incredibly high maintenance Utah princess and not my type. Second, not sure if LDSSingles.com decided "sucked" is a bad word and screened it out or if it was a glitch in the system, but either way it's pretty funny. I'd love to know what she thought when she saw this, but she never wrote back. Oh well, on to BarbieGirl85...
With one girl from Utah I decided to take the direct approach:
Me: My name is Ryan. You seem like the type of person I would like to get to know better. Are you interested?
Her: But you're from Cali
Me: The adventure intrigues you? Ever dated a guy from CA before?
Her: Not while he lived in Cali
Me: Have you ever been in a long distance relationship before?
Her: Yes and it was really tough
What I wrote: Ha Ha yeah me too and it sucked! To be honest with you the only reason I'm even considering girls away from home is because I travel a bit for work so I'm open to meeting girls in other places. In fact I used to live in SLC for a couple of years and loved it. What part of SLC do you live?
What actually got posted:
First, don't judge me for trying to connect with women who use BarbieGirl84 as their username - she is pretty attractive and had a witty profile so I figured I could look past the fact that she's probably an incredibly high maintenance Utah princess and not my type. Second, not sure if LDSSingles.com decided "sucked" is a bad word and screened it out or if it was a glitch in the system, but either way it's pretty funny. I'd love to know what she thought when she saw this, but she never wrote back. Oh well, on to BarbieGirl85...
International Playboy doesn't scream "loving father and husband." If I were you I would ditch name that fast. It is that personality that twenty something girls, especially online, are skeptical of. if you're looking for a good time, keep it around. But the ones that want marriage and family will run like the wind.
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty funny, Ryan. I think most girls value honesty, so just be yourself.
ReplyDeleteThough that was pretty funny, something you said put me in mind to remind you that you shouldn't judge based off of how someone looks and completely overlook a personality trait you aren't attracted to--well that is if you are looking for something more and deeper but like the other person said if you are just looking for a good time then I guess that is the way to go. I just want to see you happily settled with someone who is going to make you a better person and someone who you can make into a better person as well. You are amazing and you shouldn't settle for a superficial girl because you deserve a warm-hearted woman!
ReplyDeleteVery funny exchange. I can understand her reaction but the interactions I have had with you.... well she missed out,but glad she did. Now I will have my daughter set up a BarbieGirl85 profile. Interestingly enough the name doesn't suit her at all. She is warmhearted, funny, athletic, sensitive and kind,and very intelligent...not that a BarbieGirl couldn't have these attributes. It is just BarbieGirl just doesn't suit her.
ReplyDeleteThere's definitely not a silver bullet intro email that will work with everyone. I think experimenting is the right way to go. It's a scattershot approach, similar to throwing pasta against the wall and seeing if it sticks.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Anonymous #1 about the "international playboy" line in your profile. I don't think people interpret it the way you intend them to interpret it. Perhaps "international traveler" or "frequent business traveler".
That's hilarious.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/11/19/marriage-study_n_4299002.html